Monday, August 08, 2011

Whispers from the Valley Part 4

I spent many years where I quit praising God when things went well. Fear had such a tight hold on my heart. You see, I'd say "God thank you for my babies being healthy", and someone would break an arm. I'd say "God thank you for healing me from depression", and depression would rise up like a monster and knock me right out. I'd say "God I praise you that I have been set free from self harm", to find myself hurting me only days later. I said God thank you for setting me free from abuse, only to have the man I was married to abuse me

I thought it made me look stupid, and God look bad. SO . . . I shut up. I stayed mad and self defeated. I went on a tail spin downward that would make most of you fall out your seat. Mad, sad, and scared were consistent, they were easy, and expected. I was comfortably miserable.

The truth is that is a selfish and rotten way to live. It is not at all where or how God would want me to live my life. "God has not given me a spirit of fear, but of LOVE, POWER, and a STRONG MIND."

God has a purpose, a plan, a destiny for me. My circumstances and personal struggles do not change that. They are only here to create in me the person I need to be for what God has for me to do.

28 And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. (Romans 8 : 28 - ESV)

What I have learned is that God is I am. Not I was. Not I will be. Everyday I go without succumbing to previous personal downfalls is worthy of His praise. If you find me failing tomorrow, know that I am human, but He is still God. If people around me hurt my heart, I praise Him for having a heart that can be broken.

Praise Him. Praise Him no matter where you are, or how you feel, or what they say, because God has a plan.

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