Friday, December 16, 2022

What You Need to Know About Suicide

 As most know, I work in the mental health field and have spent the last two years taking calls, all day long, from people in crisis, many of whom are suicidal. Here are some things you need to know.

1. Every single caller I have spoken to thinks that everyone else is ok. I will say to them, “Listen, I’m sure your company loves and appreciates you. BUT, I’m expensive. Your company would not hire an entire staff of counselors like me if you were the only one who needed help.” Most give a little nervous laugh but still don’t believe me because when they look around they see everyone else doing great. So, I’ll ask them, "Who knows you are talking to me right now? No one. Right, and in the same way, you don’t know who else is calling either.” 

2. There are sometimes delays with the National Suicide Hotline (988) or Crisis Text Line (741741). If you are giving out resources to someone you know that is struggling, give multiple options. An easy way to find resources is to search the topic they are dealing with or their demographics + crisis line. An example, for a new mom, you could search new parent crisis hotline. 

3. Be nice to people calling you, yes, even unwanted calls.  You really don’t know what the person is going through behind the scenes. I have been on calls with customer service employees who were in hysterics and would get a call and have to put me on hold. I would hear them take a breath and switch on their professional voice to get through the call. I would wait on the wailing that comes after suffocating oneself for the sake of security. That customer had no idea their actions or words could be what pushes that person to suicide. 

4. Do NOT be afraid to ask hard questions. People want to talk. They are silently begging for someone to see them.

Thursday, December 15, 2022

Do You Hear Me, Even Now?

I’m sure it is no surprise to You that we aren’t friends right now. 

I forgave You for him, and him, and so many hims, most days,  my heart can’t breathe.

I forgave You for lost babies.

I forgave You for repeated patterns,  loneliness, and even still….

You took my Andramada.

Fuck You for that. 

And with that, most of Your people just stopped listening. 

Jessi said bad words. 

They can’t handle bad words or big brokenness. They have somehow deluded themselves into thinking it is what You said.

They forgot about what it must feel like to have nails hammered through Your wrists while Your people said nothing.

They forgot how much Your heart broke knowing He could have stopped this, but didn’t.

So many things I could say, but…..

But NOWHERE did You ever preach a prosperity gospel.

You knew it was nonsense created by the comfortable

NOWHERE did You ever say things would be ok, You just promised we wouldn’t be alone.

So here I am, the most screwed up of these, begging Your people to show up, because people are dying.

People are smiling on TikTok, being snarky on Instagram, and dying in the darkness.

So if they won’t, I have reached a point where my love for them is bigger than my anger for You. My guess is that is how You may have felt. 

This should be interesting. 

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