One of the hardest things you will ever have to do, my dear, is grieve the loss of a person who is still alive. -Unknown

Every day of my life, and far too many people. Some days it bothers me more than others. Today is one of those days.

Choosing healthy and safety doesn't always feel very good when you just want people who should be, to be who they should be. At this point I don't even try anymore. I'm not looking for repair, because the reality is that it's just not healthy. I am enough and worthy of being loved. I refuse to waste one more second hoping I could somehow do enough or be enough to not be disposable.

I have many people around me who do just that.

I just need to get to a place where my heart doesn't ache over it.